I'm A Mess Love Me Anyways
by Jessizle95
Summary: Takes place after Maeve's death. Even though Spencer is drunk and is in the middle of his grieving process Jennifer sees the truth within his eyes and his true feelings for her. One night on a rare occasion, they let there true feelings escape. This story is an AU, paring of Spencer and Jennifer. Rated M. One-shot.


He paced himself at the bar, sipping his cocktail mixture next to a blonde beauty. He felt completely lost, embedded in a sea of emotions. He was for once, utterly speechless as his heart sunk deeper at the thought of the burnet hair and her smile. He tipped his glass as the blonde's hand brushed his arm as if in a warming comfort. He placed his glass down on the marble counter top and went to leave the bar.

"Come with me…" He said as he held out his hand to the blonde beauty. "I'm a mess right now…and I don't want to be alone…" he spoke with such sadness that the cracking of his voice formed soft tears in her eyes.

"Spence…" she responded as she took his hand softly letting him lead her to his home.

He walked backwards to his apartment facing her the whole way. Watching her smile and just be happy. She brushed the side of her hair out of her face, "What?" she asked

"I'm a mess right now and you have been nothing but kind."

"Just because you are hurt right now doesn't mean I don't want to be around you Spence…at a time like this you need a friend."

"You have always been my friend." He said as he reached out his hand.

She graciously took it, "I'll always be your friend Spence…"

He pulled her into his body. Wrapping his arms around her squeezing her tightly. He counted the seconds he held onto her. _One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten._ He pulled his head back looking into her eyes. Her blue eyes never looked so beautiful, so innocent, so peaceful, so welcoming. He lowered his gaze to her lips and slowly yet ever so carefully. Brushing her lips, before pressing his lips against hers harder. He stood in the moment taken in the sweetness of her lips. He felt her smile form underneath his.

"Spence…" she whispered ever so gently,

"Shhhh…" he whispered as he pressed his lips against hers again.

They reached the door of his apartment, "please stay with me tonight…I don't want to be alone. I want to fall in love tonight Jennifer Jareau. I want to fall in love with you. I have been hurt to many times when it comes to love but you have always been there for me…please…" He begged wrapping his arms around her tightly feeling his fingers intertwine as he pressed her body up against his door, slowly reaching for the knob as he kissed her gently.

She pulled back looking into the sea of emotions that played in his eyes. She read for what they spoke, grief, sadness, heartbroken, but what triumphed over all was love. His love was genuine, not just out of grief and being drunk but truly genuine. She slowly raised her hand to his chest feeling his heart beat underneath his clothing. Moving her hand to his cheek and brushing her hand up against his skin. "I'm here for you Spence…" She breathed as he finally found his grip on the knob, pulling him into his apartment.

"I want to feel your love…" he whispered as he led her to his bedroom. "you are here with me walking me home as drunk as I, and yet you are still here." He whispered pulling her in for another kiss.

"Because even if you are haunted by your grief I still love you Spence…I always will." She responded with a gentle kiss in return.

"I love you Jennifer Jareau." He whispered tugging on the back of her dress unzipping the zipper.

He slid his hands around her body feeling her skin underneath the dress. He slipped his arms up around her shoulders pulling off the straps of her dress watching the dress fall. Revealing the beauty that is her.

"You see something you like?" She teased

"Most definitely," He responded kissing her lips.

She followed his gestures and uncovered the beauty that was him. He clinched to her tightly but gentle as he pushed her in the direction of the bed, feeling her skin upon his. His heart raced, as his emotions mixed, the thought of Maeve and all his grief disappeared filling his body with one rare emotion he so little felt, love. He repeated kissing her, touching her body, pressing his up against hers. He listened to her breathing as it began to race, her eyes spoke for what she was feeling, for what he was feeling. She invited him into her body for this one rare occasion. And he wasn't going to let her down, let himself down.

He continued to kiss her softly, every single kiss filled with passion. Trailing his kisses down her body and back to her lips. The soft moaning pleasure sound that escaped from her lips, the tiny little goose bumps that trailed behind each kiss across her abdomen, gave him satisfaction that he was doing everything she ever wanted him to do with her body.

He whispered, "I love you Jennifer Jareau, more than you will ever know."

As dawn began to fall the next day, a smile parted across his face as he seen his sleeping beauty lying next to him. He gently brushed her hair out of her face as and in doing so a smile appeared on her face as well. She opened her blue eyes and stared into his brown eyes. "I love you Dr. Spencer Reid." She leaned up to his lips and kissed them softly and placed her head up against his chest listening to his heartbeat.

_**Please Review! Thanks!**_


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